Social Anxiety

Mental health is such a big topic lately. It’s crazy how friends and family may not understand but complete strangers do. All over the internet, I see people cry out for help from complete strangers because they do not find that support from their own family or friends. Behind a screen, they take off their mask and post just about anything. They are simply looking for someone who understands. I find it incredible how individuals jump to encourage someone that is going through a hard time and just needs affirmation or someone to tell them, “me too, I’ve gone through the same thing”.

Now me, well there’s times I’ve posted some of my own struggles or mental battles on social media. I’ve begun to be more transparent on this website. Of course, I’ve taken my struggles to God first and asked Him for help. But I like sharing certain things I go through so that other people can feel like they’re not alone. I have friends that care of too. I have a community of people that love me. But then again, I've always just portrayed myself as people have come to know me, unshakable.

I'm supposed to be the strong one. I'm supposed to be the helper. I'm supposed to be the shoulder and the listening ear, and the helping hand. I’m the go-to person when you need one.

When you become those things, it's a little hard to find a moment when you need someone else to be those things for you. Especially when you're constantly trying to bring joy and laughter and encouragement. To be different in a world full of negativity. You don't want to show that to people cause there's already too much out there.

I'll admit that I'm the one that avoids crowds when I can. I'll make an excuse and leave if I'm overwhelmed or uncomfortable. I know that there's some out there who laugh and say that's stupid. I genuinely don't understand why they don't understand. I guess when someone isn't like you it's hard to wrap your mind around certain things.

It doesn't happen to me often so sometimes I don’t really think about it. It happened to me the other day. (by the time this post goes up it’ll probably be a few months ago) So now I'm just writing about it trying to make sense of my emotions. Putting it on paper helps me.

What helps you get over moments of social anxiety?

This is just one of those random thoughts I have that I’d typically leave in my hidden archives. But I’m here wanting to let all my strong people out there that, I know. I feel you. I see you. It's ok to pull away sometimes and work on you. You aren't always supposed to be what people just assume you to always be. Just take it one moment at a time and keep being the amazing person you are.

PS: I low-key didn't want to post this one just because I wanted to avoid any people I know reaching out all like "omg I didn't know! You should have said something!"

Kbye. Thanks for reading.